I once read this quote: “Later I realized, driving with one hand is also cool, peeling shrimp for myself is tasty, boneless fish is delicious, pouring hot water for myself is satisfying, and a bouquet of flowers doesn’t have to be expensive.”
When you read this quote, how did you feel? What I want to say is, in love, never be too submissive or dependent on someone. That’s not the best way to love.
At the beginning of this article, I want to share a story of a friend. Here is her story:
I was with my boyfriend for 4 years, and I felt like I became someone I hated.
We met at the same workplace, and he pursued me actively. At first, I had no feelings for him.
But with him sending flowers every week, waiting for me downstairs after work, and even staying by my side when I was sick, I was gradually touched by his gentleness and thoughtfulness.
I told myself that maybe I should give the one who loves me a chance.
As I got to know him more, we were very sweet in the beginning of our relationship, always together. His efforts made me feel like I wanted to spend my life with him.
Later, as we officially started living together, I fell even deeper in love with him.
Every day, cooking at home and waiting for him after work brought me immense happiness.
I learned cooking for him, and seeing him enjoy my food made me very happy.
To ensure he had good meals at work, I would go home every lunchtime to cook for him. I knew how hard he worked, so I quit my job for a less-paying one with more flexible hours to take better care of him.
But as time passed, our relationship didn’t seem as happy as we imagined.
There was a period when he often stayed out late with friends, not answering my calls or messages. This led to significant conflicts between us.
When I asked him why he didn’t answer my calls, he yelled at me, “Can you stop bothering me every day? I’m really annoyed by you now. Can’t you give me some freedom?”
After hearing this, I turned away and cried. At that moment, all my grievances poured out.
Not long after, we ended our 4-year relationship. I initiated the breakup, and he didn’t try to stop me.
Is it wrong to love someone too much? The answer is no.
But later, I understood.
Never degrade yourself for someone, because in the end, you will be the one getting hurt.
I share my story in the hope that all girls can understand: don’t lose yourself in love, never be too kind to a man, as your efforts will end up being undervalued.
After hearing her story, I deeply agreed.
The proof—Don’t be too kind to a man, he will take the initiative to love you.
What you can’t get will always stir up your desire, and those favored will be fearless.
When you love a man too much, you become cheap in his eyes.
A famous singer once said, “I won’t scold my girl, won’t lose my temper, because I know many people are good to her, but she chose me. I have no reason not to love her.”
When a man loves you, he won’t want to see you hurt, so he will do everything to love you.
Throughout history, how many people have been blinded by love, willing to do anything for the sake of “love.”
But in real life, relationships should be mutual. One person’s efforts cannot guarantee the happiness of both. If only one person willingly gives while the other just accepts, the relationship will eventually fail.
Why shouldn’t you be too kind to a man? Because men have a strong desire to conquer. They like challenges. When a woman willingly gives everything to them, they won’t cherish it.
Girls who love too deeply, in the end, are moved not by the other person but by themselves.
When you don’t rely on the other person for anything, they will feel insignificant in your life. To get your attention, they will go out of their way to treat you better.
The less you need him, the more he will try to be good to you.
Don’t be too kind to a man; he will take the initiative to love you more.
As a girl, don’t be too submissive in love. Learn to value yourself more to make a man love you more.
Learn to love yourself, don’t lose yourself for others. That is the right choice.
Love your partner 70% and yourself 30%. How you love yourself is how you teach others to love you.
Be a smart woman, don’t lose yourself for a man.