In a man’s life, there are two things he can’t afford to lose: a failed career and a love disappointment. When these two things happen together, they can easily break a person.
For most men, falling in love with a good woman means as long as they are willing to endure hardships, life will not be aimless and will turn out well. But if a man falls for a woman who doesn’t care about him, no matter how strong he is, he won’t be able to carry her along.
Many experienced individuals understand that forcing or going against one’s heart in a relationship is a big mistake. Before getting married, a man should be clear in his mind whether the marriage is based on love or financial motives.
Every bit of unhappiness in a relationship is a potential crisis for the marriage in the future.
I watched a video where on the day of their daughter’s wedding, the mother demanded a higher price, causing distress to the groom who came to welcome the bride.
The “mother-in-law” tilted her head, looking disdainful and impatient. She insisted that ten thousand wasn’t enough, implying that she had the upper hand and wouldn’t let her daughter go unless her demands were met!
The groom’s party looked uneasy. Clearly, the groom never expected such a scene from the bride’s family, let alone such a ridiculous situation of bargaining on their joyous day, leaving him helpless. Meanwhile, the bride sat on the bed, counting the money as if nothing was wrong.
As she was about to enter her new life, she seemed indifferent to her husband’s predicament, disregarding the gazes around her, only focused on the money…
Love and marriage are a two-way street
On the day of their wedding, supposed to be a joyous occasion, turned into a day of “counting money.” There is an old saying, “Counting money when you shake hands and part ways,” which means it’s a transaction. Negotiating in public is nothing but a business deal.
Do you think this is the end of it?
On their way back from the wedding ceremony, the groom’s party encountered roadblocks set by people demanding more money. Someone shouted, “Without the ‘red envelopes,’ you can’t leave.”
Anyone could see that without the interference from the bride’s family, the groom’s welcome would have been smooth.
If you were the groom, facing such a situation where the other party keeps causing trouble, would you still want to marry this woman? Are you willing to marry someone who doesn’t have your back?
This question is not up for discussion for now, as marriage is a give-and-take process. One reaches out, the other is willing to give, and if both find it suitable, it works.
Surely many people have experienced such unexpected events during wedding ceremonies. If you want to take the person with you, you can’t afford to be stingy. Even if the other party sets a price, you have to go along with it.
In the end, even if there are more “suitable” options available, if it weren’t for the family’s feelings, many people would have walked away long ago.
Some say, instead of choosing such a partner, it’s better to save money or remain single. Those with dignity, just shouldn’t marry.
But then again, if you don’t marry, someone else will. Marriage and relationships are filled with a sense of practicality; if you don’t have good luck, this is the only way. Despite being helpless, it’s better than being single.
This is the reality of modern marriage—some individuals are willing to pay, but if they pay less, the other party may still not agree. Ultimately, love has lost its value in the minds of many.
Love is fair, it treats you as you treat it
As far as I know, there is a place where the wedding customs are even more outrageous.
In general, there are various fees such as entrance fees, name change fees, bowing fees, gift-watching fees, boarding fees, alighting fees, bride’s name change fee, and so on, with many items…
You want to enter, but there’s no door! You have to express your sincerity with money if they don’t open the door for you. Money can make the devil push the mill, so when you pay, they understand.
After seeing the bride, the mother-in-law stands between you, and you have to pay the name-change fee. Even if you call her “mom,” you still have to pay; otherwise, she won’t respond, no matter how loudly you call, it’s useless.
You have to pay a bowing fee when you leave, bow to the mother-in-law and father-in-law, and even after bowing, you have to give some money. If you can’t follow this etiquette, you won’t be able to take the person with you.
As for the gift-watching fee, those who cheer and applaud also don’t do it for free; they need tea money too.
Besides, there are boarding and alighting fees; if you don’t have money, they won’t let you get on or off the vehicle. By the end of this journey, you need several tens of thousands.
One place learns from another, gradually becoming common practice.
If the wife’s family has many children, and they all come in large numbers, you can’t leave even if you want to; at the very least, one person per vehicle. On the day of the wedding, some places have such bizarre customs that can challenge the groom’s outlook on life!
Hence, it’s essential to understand the customs before choosing a partner. If you choose a lover from an unfamiliar place, you might worry on your wedding day.
Some people turn back in anger, calling off the wedding. Some cry and wail for a long time, eventually sending someone back home to get money…
When love turns into a transaction, and marriage becomes a form of “trade,” that relationship is based on money above all else. Some people claim to love you, but in reality, they love your money.
Today, the materialistic concept of marriage is becoming clearer, gradually lowering the standard of love, making some people lose faith in love.
In a marriage built on materialism and demands, how can it last long? What makes this kind of marriage happy?
This is a marital philosophy question.
In essence, love is fair; for both men and women, how you treat it will determine how it treats you in the future, even with “interest.”
Only by pursuing similar spouses can one have a harmonious relationship.
Not being on the same page with your husband leads to a tough life
Some might say these are just customs that should be respected.
Certainly, customs should be respected, but the custom of demanding a higher price is all a bad habit. Even if the groom complies with the “custom,” does he not have any complaints in his heart?
Marriage is about living together for a long time, not a one-time transaction. The public bargaining by the bride’s family, even if it makes the groom uncomfortable, is not a sign of “great joy.”
Many places like to use various “monetary rituals” to express the depth of love, which may seem glorious on the surface, for auspicious reasons. If you love someone, you should express your love and let everyone see it.
In reality, it has long been proven that using the quantity of “rituals” to express love is self-deception. No matter how well you cover it up, it cannot conceal a heart tainted by self-interest.
Love is a matter of two people
Love, fundamentally, is a matter between two people. Whether it’s true or false love, as long as both parties are willing, there’s no need for others to judge.
But as humans, we should have integrity and virtue, should have a sense of shame. As the Book of Songs says, “A man without proper conduct, what’s the point of living?”
Fundamentally, the bride’s family can demand money, even exorbitant amounts. However, demanding a higher price is not a noble act.
There is a well-known saying in modern society: “It’s better to break the law than to anger the public!” Once the matter spreads, it sets a bad example, leading to negative consequences. Those demanding a high price should bear this responsibility.
Every person leading a meaningful life should do so with dignity. Whether it’s love or marriage, if you strip someone of their dignity, it may seem justified to you. But one day, when they rise above, you’ll know who will be most embarrassed.
I have discussed many similar cases in my articles before, emphasizing that a couple should share the benefits.
When a woman is in that position, she should consider her husband. Regardless, she should put herself in her husband’s shoes, as he is the one who will be with her for a lifetime.
Otherwise, what’s the point of marriage? Is it just for making money?
Some couples can foresee the future on the first day
I was planning to write a case study, but after giving it some thought, I decided against it. I have covered many similar cases before, where some couples, from their behavior on the wedding day, can predict their future.
The bride’s family demanding a higher price and the wife helping count the money indicate that such women are likely not marrying for love. Diving into the money, they are unlikely to care for their partners in the future.
In moments of prosperity, they may get along well. But once they face adversity or slight discontent, the man will understand the kind of person he has married.
It’s best to avoid regrets in relationships and not go against your heart. For men, even if they have no choice but to compromise, they should be cautious of their partners.
Remember, never let your guard down; the current dating and marriage trends have shifted, and there are women who, by nature, bring embarrassment and trouble. You might think that marrying them will bring peace, but in the future, you will encounter similar embarrassments and troubles, if not worse.
To reiterate, a man can’t afford to lose two things in his life: besides choosing the wrong profession, marrying a woman who is not on the same page as you will lead to even more embarrassment.